How Fickle Is Woman
by dutchtreat
Summary: Elena believes she has found a great gift for Damon, but is quite surprised by his reaction to it. Written for the A2A Holiday Fic Exchange on LJ.


A/N: This is written for the prompt by lcra13 for badboysarebest's A2A Holiday Fic Exchange on LJ. The prompt was:

_Elena has a hard time finding a gift for Damon – because what do you get for the guy that you didn't pick, but can't let go of, right? She ends up finding the perfect gift and gives it to Damon in front of everyone as they open presents at the boarding house. Damon snaps – because mixed signals and all – Elena runs after him, confession plays out and smut would be uncharacteristic, but an amazing kiss needs to happen, and teasing, and hormones going crazy._

I've tried to stick to the prompt as closely as possible, but also make it canon with where the show is at the moment. So this is set somewhere between episode 4x09 and 4x10.

Oneshot. Characters are not mine. Title is a quote from Gone With The Wind. Thanks to Carol for the inspiration with her GwtW love, and for proofreading this for me! Thank you for reading, and reviews are appreciated.

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**How Fickle Is Woman**

_BENG!_

The door of the boarding house closed loudly, blowing snow into the hallway, making the ornaments in the Christmas tree tinkle, and leaving those left behind in the living room sit in stunned silence.

For a minute that was, of course, because silences when Caroline Forbes was in a room just never lasted very long.

"Well, that's just great," the blonde exclaimed, drawing all eyes from the door to her. "Leave it to Damon to ruin a perfectly wonderful Christmas."

"Oh, please Caroline," Elena sighed, shock about Damon's reaction to her present still on her face. "Don't blame this on Damon. We all should've known that Bonnie perhaps spent a bit too much time sniffing those witchy herbs when she proposed to get Jer and Damon out of the lake house to spend Christmas here with us. Somebody was gonna snap eventually. It was inevitalbe. Guess Damon just doesn't care about Christmas enough to keep up appearances."

"But why would he not want to do that? We're all friends and family here. Why can't he just pretend to have a good time. Why act this way. Bet it was just another one of those douchey things he does to bring down the mood or to piss me off.

"Please don't fool yourself Care, the tension in this room has been palpable since we all gathered around here. Jeremy is having a hard time fighting his hunter urges now that he is suddenly in a room with not one, but four vampires and a hybrid, I've been trying to keep myself from crawling in to Damon's lap all evening, and both you and Stefan have been glaring and casting accusatory glances every time he looked your way. I don't know what exactly about my gift made him want to get out so suddenly, but I do know that the look on his face was hurt, and nothing else."

"Elena, please calm down," Stefan interrupted, eyeing the two bickering friends carefully. "Nobody is blaming Damon."

"Ugh! Just shut it, Stefan," Elena suddenly cried, fed up with the whole situation. "Of course you blame Damon. You've been blaming him your entire life for all kinds of everything, and now that this sire bond has come into play, you've been even more awful to him than you've ever been before. He didn't ask for this, and neither did I. And if anything, this sire bond has brought us something wonderful, something that I thought I would never ever see."

"What do you mean? What positive thing could ever come from this?"

"Happiness, Stefan. I've seen Damon happy. It was the most beautiful thing that I've ever seen and it hurts my heart just knowing how short lived it was, and that I have now apparently hurt him again."

"Don't kid yourself, Elena. My brother doesn't do happy, at least not anymore. Whatever you thought you saw was either gloating about finally getting you away from me or it was the result of great sex and one too many bourbons."

"Really Stefan, really?! You honestly believe that I cannot make your brother happy? Well, maybe for once you should just focus on him for a while. I know that you probably have convinced yourself that you have all kinds of noble, selfless reasons to be in cahoots with Klaus, but honestly, seeing both you and Caroline looking at the creep that took so many from me with admiration while trying to wiggle your way into his pants when you cannot even give a damn about your brother's feelings is sickening me."

"Elena!" Caroline gasped throwing a glance at Tyler. "I would never-"

"Just save it, Care, I've had it, I'm gonna see how Damon's doing"

And with that she just stood up and left the room, too, vaguely noticing her brother and Matt snicker about her little outburst and hearing Bonnie mumble something about needing more tea.

-o~0~o-

"I've heard you inside there you know. Wanting to crawl into my lap, huh?" Damon asked the moment she stepped outside, allerting her to where she could find him.

"Didn't think you would actually still be interested in what went on inside there after the way you ran out, so why did you listen in?" she asked while strolling over and plopping down on the low wall beside him after cleaning the snow off.

"Well I must admit that I was kinda curious if mean old me would get hell for leaving the festivities, and, surprise-surprise, Barbie and the bunny biter didn't disappoint."

"Damon ... "

"Oh, don't worry your pretty little head about it Elena, it was to be expected. Didn't quite count on your little outburst, though, and I was actually bummed that I didn't get to witness dear baby bro's face when you accused him of trying to get into Klaus's pants," he grinned, waggling his eyebrows at her.

"Yeah," she smiled at him. "Guess your influence on me still lingers."

"Don't say things like that, sweetheart. It reminds me too much of why we are even in this weird situation to begin with."

She felt him tentatively brush her hair behind her ear, almost afraid to touch her, and couldn't stop the look of frustration from crossing her face. "But that's all you, Damon. You just cannot accept that I have feelings for you, are so determined to believe your brother, and just refuse to give us, give _me_, a chance."

"You were right you know," he said, looking at her sadly. "I was happy. I was thrilled that you finally wanted to be with me, that perhaps I was deserving of love after all. And then Stefan told me about the bond, and the seeds of doubt were planted. I want to believe you I really do, but then I cannot help but remember all those times that you came to me, kissed me even, only to turn around and walk back to Stefan again."

"Damon," she tried again, grabbing his arm. "You do deserve to be loved, I—"

"No, please Elena, don't say it. Not now. I cannot bear to hear you say you love me and not being able to believe it. It would kill me. Guess that is why your gift upset me so much. It scared me. I looked at it and could only think 'What if that is us? What if one day you'll finally tell me you love me, and it is just too little too late and I wouldn't care anymore'."

"But that's not why I had it made," she said, thinking about the beautiful oil painting that one of the school's art students had made of the famous Gone With The Wind movie poster. "I got it for you because I knew it was one of your favorite books, and as a reminder of that night I almost lost you to that werewolf bite."

"I think deep down I know that," he sighed, taking a swig of the almost forgotten glass of bourbon next to him "but I cannot help compare myself to Rhett longing after Scarlett, and you, like her, always obsessing over your own version of Ashley, Stefan."

"But I'm not like that, Damon, not anymore at least, I know what I want, _who_ I want now. Don't deny us this! We are different people!"

He stood up. "We shouldn't even be talking about this, Elena. Until we know more about this bond, or until we find another way around it, you should stay away from me."

"And what if I can't?" she asked, getting up and grabbing his upper arms. "Isn't it weird that you want me to stay away, but yet here I am clinging to you, not obeying your 'command' at all?"

Damon just knew he had to get away from her. He could not think clearly when she was this close. Happiness and regret struggled for dominance in his mind, overwhelming his senses. "I tried to keep my distance, Elena. I tried to do the right thing by my brother, why can't you just help me try to accomplish that?"

"Because you don't need to do the right thing by your brother, dammit!" she said, stomping her feet, making him smile a little before she shocked him when she suddenly thrust her hand into the hair at the nape of his neck, pulling him to her. "You're brother has never done the right thing by you, so often you have sacrificied your own happiness for his, it is time you start looking out for yourself again, let Stefan deal with his own shit."

Her chest labored against his, making him swell and ache, so he ceased fighting her, afraid of how he would react if she continued.

"I never meant to hurt you," she said gruffly.

"Keep your distance then, please." He swallowed hard. "Or better yet, graduate quickly and find a college a long way from here."

Her other hand tangled in his hair, too. "You would really want me to be that far away from you?"

"Yes," he whispered, contradicting his words by wrapping his arms around her waist. "Yes, I really would." Anything to keep himself from giving in to his feelings and abusing the power he possibly had over her.

"No!" she said, pulling back slightly, her eyes filled with torment. "I can't let you take this away from me."

She desperately took his mouth, stunning him so much that for a second he didn't move at all. He didn't understand what was going on. Why she was acting this way, doing things that she shouldn't be able to do if that bond was real, but yet she was.

Her head twisted, her lips claiming his, her hands gently carressing his cheeks, urging him to respond. He shuddered against her, lost in his longing, afraid to give in, but just as afraid to let her go. His mouth opened, and she whimpered as his tongue, wet, skilled and soft as velvet finally slipped inside.

"Please let me stay," she whispered. "Please."

His need and hunger made him moan, and his hands were now cupping the back of her head, angling her better, deepening their connection, and making her stomach clench with desire.

His right hand slipped down her back, pushing her into his body. As she felt his desire mirror hers she started rubbing against him, trying to relieve some of the rapidly building tension.

"We really shouldn't be doing this," he murmured, trying to put some distance between them.

"But Damon, I—"

"No!" he snarled, mad at his own weakness, pushing her away from him with a curse. "Don't say it, Elena, please. Don't!

She wrapped her arms around her own middle. Quivering in the sudden cold and saddened by the snowflakes that had started falling again, and now seemed to be mocking her with their cheerfulness.

"But you love me, why can't I love you in return?" she asked, with a small, shaky voice. "Why can I not have that, why won't you believe me?"

"Because I cannot trust that your feelings are entirely real, Elena. I tried to tell you before. I don't know anything for sure at this moment. You've hurt me so much in the past, and I want this to be what I've always dreamed about, but I cannot do it. Not right now."

"But I've dreams like that about you, too," she said softly, tossing caution aside and approaching him again, her fingers touching the hard ridges of his abdomen.

He angrily caught her wrist, wrenching it aways from his body. "Please, stop touching me!"

Her lower lip quivered, and he couldn't help but feel quilty about his harsh reaction and about hurting her. He was at war with himself, and she didn't deserve to be treated like this. This wasn't her fault. So he kissed her again. One last time. Softly his lips brushed across hers, then retreating. It was another goodbye and they both knew it.

This was a stalemate and as unfair and unsatifying as those were, they simply couldn't do anything about it. At least not at the moment. Elena knew this, but still tears filled her eyes when she watched him walk away from her, the falling snow making him seem to disappear into thin air.

"You were right about one thing, though, Elena," she suddenly heard him say from the shadows. "As much as I need to stay away from you now for my own sanity, I'm definitely not like Rhett Butler at all. I may not trust your feelings now, and I don't know if or when I ever will, but frankly, my dear, I _do_ give a damn."

-o~0~o-

The End


End file.
